Programma Televisivo: Stargate SG-1 - 7x3
General, what's this all about?
At 0920 hours this morning, someone tried to enter the base using this.
Colonel O'Neill's security ID.
After the person in question was taken into custody, he insisted on seeing you.
Me?
Why?
Well, I was hoping you could figure that one out, Major.
Open it.
Thank you.
Now we're gettin' somewhere.
Sergeant, that, uh, coffee.
I asked for half an hour ago?
You know, any time you feel like gettin' it...
He's a boy, Sir.
As it turns out, Carter...
yes, I am...
for the moment.
Do I know you?
Come on...
it's me.
We tried to contact Colonel O'Neill, even sent someone to his house.
Do you understand how much trouble you're in right now?
Impersonating a military officer is a federal offense.
I am not impersonating anyone.
I am Jack O'Neill.
Finally.
Hot chocolate?
Are you kidding?
Where did you get this?
I didn't...
I didn't get it anywhere.
It's mine.
Because you're Colonel O'Neill.
Exactly.
Look, last night, I ate some dinner, had a beer, went to bed and woke up like this.
Now can we please just get to the part where you and Fraiser run some tests,...
find a cure and make me big again?
This is the security breach?
Daniel...
will you tell them who I am...
please?
Okay...
love to...
who are you?
This young man claims he's Colonel O'Neill.
It's a joke, right?
What's goin' on?
Daniel!
Sounds like him...
at least the loud, grating parts.
Okay...
you want proof?
Carter, you once carried a Tok'ra named Jolinar, who gave her life to save you.
Daniel, until recently, you were anascended being.
Ya broke the rules.
Ya got yourself kicked outta the Oma Desala fan club and had your memory erased.
And you and Bra'tac both just lost your snakes in a Goa'uld ambush.
Had your tretonin yet this morning?
How could this child possess such knowledge?
no clue Because...
it's...
me.
Would anyone care to speculate how a boy could be aware of our most classified information?
Well, Sir...
it could be him.
There is a physical resemblance.
But he can't be more than 15 years old.
Are you saying Colonel O'Neill has, somehow, regressed more than 30 years overnight?
Stranger things have happened...
Name but one.
Well, there was the time he got really old, the time he became a caveman, the time we all swapped bodies...
Why don't we move on to the testing portionof this exercise?
Are you certain, Doctor?
Initial tests show that within an acceptable margin of error,...
the boy's DNA is virtually identical to Colonel O'Neill's.
What size margin of error are we talking about?
Very small.
In a court of law, the DNA sample we took from the boy...
would be considered a high-probability match to the DNA we have on file from Colonel O'Neill.
There is a...
tiny abnormality, but for all intents and purposes...
it's him.
To be honest, this is out of my league.
We've got some specialists flying in.
We're going to run more tests, see what we can learn.
In the meantime, I suggest we try to make him as comfortable as possible.
I'll go set up a PlayStation.
You know, uh, I think you two are enjoying this just...
a little too much.
Well...
you are kinda cute.
That's "Sir" to you.
And being trapped inside a scrawny little body isn't my idea of cute, Carter.
Does possessing a younger body not have certain advantages, O'Neill?
No.
Not seein' it.
What do you mean?
Do you not experience increased health and vitality?
My "vitality" was just fine, thank you.
I think what Teal'c is saying is valid.
How many of us wouldn't trade everything for the chance to be young again...
live our lives over?
Yeah, well, I don't plan on staying like this.
Well, in the meantime, may I make a suggestion?
Try enjoying this as much as we are...
Sir.
Well, it's nice to know some things don't change.
We'll have this stuff sent back to the lab for analysis.
Well, if they find MSG, I will never order from them again.
Come on, what are we doing here, exactly?
Well, this is the last place you remember being...
Older?
Are you conducting some sort of scientific experiment, O'Neill?
Hey, come on, that salsa's still good.
What was the last thing you ate, Sir?
Four cheese burrito, some guacamole on the side...
Anything else?
A beer.
Then I hit the sack.
So, whatever happened to you must have occurred once you were asleep.
Hey!
Do you mind?
Teal'c...
Whoa...
O'Neill...
What is it?
Either I'm...
remembering a particularly bad dream...
or the Asgard paid me a little visit last night.
No offense, but what you're saying doesn't make any sense.
Jack's account sounds like a number of UFO abduction case files I've read.
This you remember...
my birthday you forget.
Looks like you'll have a lot more...
This encounter is incongruous with all previous contact we have had with the Asgard.
Thor has indicated that the Asgard have been keeping an eye on human development on Earth in the past.
But we're allies now.
We've cooperated with them on a number of missions.
This...
I would not have agreed to.
What could they possibly hope to gain from secretly making you younger against your will?
I got nothing.
General, uh, I'd like to cross-reference some of these old abduction accounts.
See if I can find any connection.
Please do.
Major, I believe you had a briefing to run at 1300 hours...
Yes, Sir.
I'll be there.
Wait, wait, the F-302 briefing?
I though I was running that.
Given your current situation, I feel it would be best if Major Carter handled it.
I'm sure you can impart any information she needs to know to fill in the gap...
But...
I mean, I'm the one...
Good.
Dismissed.
Jack,try to understand.
Your situation puts me in a very difficult position.
Uh, General, no offense, but you're not the one who went tobed watching CNN...
and woke up as part of the MTV generation.
Which is exactly why Major Carter's going to handle that briefing.
Sir, I've flown the 302 more times than anyone else.
Be that as it may, the bottom line is a room full of seasoned pilots...
aren't going to respect the opinion of a boy.
Sir, I just look like one...
for the moment...
but those men in that room need my expertise.
And plus, you know, if they're gonna be working here, they're gonna...
have to start gettin' used to...
you know...
unusual things happening.
Look, Jack...
no one is disputing that you may continue to be a valuable asset to the SGC...
but under the circumstances, there's nothing I can do.
I'm sorry.
Yes, Sir.
I understand.
Dumb idea...
It would appear that a great many of the Tau'ri have encountered beings from other worlds.
Yep, hmm...
little do they know how close they are to the truth.
What, exactly, are we looking for, Daniel Jackson?
Well, any abduction accounts that...
match Jack's story, and, um, obviously,...
anyone claiming to have physically regressed several decades overnight.
We just need to enter our search parameters into the database...
It has already been done.
Wow...
that's a lot of people.
Indeed.
Let's see if any of these match Jack's story exactly...
what he said he saw...
four green lights...
That's a little more reasonable.
That's interesting...
of the narrowed down accounts, the most recent is from...
19 year ago.
Eight are here in the 'States.
You know, if these addresses are still valid, we should go talk to these people in person.
What do you hope to learn?
I guess we'll know when we learn it.
As your intel packages show, the F-302 is a space-worthy, fighter-interceptor aircraft...
reverse-engineered from Goa'uld technology.
You're upcoming mission has been dubbed operation blue phoenix.
It'll be a live-fire combat simulation to test how well the 302 fares against actual death gliders.
Major, according to our mission reports, you were second seat...
on the most recent mission involving the 302.
Yes, and that one included close combat.
We'll be covering what was learned in that encounter in this briefing.
Didn't Colonel O'Neill pilot that mission?
Yes, as a matter of fact, he did.
The Colonel also commanded the X-302 during both previous hyper-space window missions, didn't he, Major?
What's your point, Major?
With all due respect, Ma'am, shouldn't Colonel O'Neill be running this briefing?
Colonel O'Neill is unavailable.
However, I've prepared several computer models which should help you...
understand how the 302 handles in combat situations.
Major, no offense, but those aren't going to help me...
when I'm pulling 6 Gs in a dogfight against an alien ship.
As you should know, Captain, the 302 has inertial dampening systems...
...which I am more than qualified to explain in detail, so, let's just...
I just dropped by to say...
Ow!
Sir, please do not resist.
Hey, ease up, big guy.
...
stay focused.
Relax, sir.
I'm warning you...
Sir, please, stay there.
Did I just say I'm warning you?
Hey!
Oh!
All right!
That's it!
Now, I'm mad!
You can release him.
I'll forgo the charges for assaulting a superior officer.
Carter...
I could've taken him.
I'm sure.
Sorry, I'm late.
What'd I miss?
We were just covering the 302's flight capabilities.
Well, then, I'm just in time.
Here's what you need to know...
Major, is this a joke?
No...
this is...
Colonel O'Neill.
I'm only gonna say this once, so I'd suggest that you listen up.
Whatever you say...
Hey!
I realize it doesn't actually say "Colonel" anywhere on my uniform, but it should.
Yes, sir.
Now...
velocity is key during engagement with a glider.
Now, your instincts are gonna tell ya to floor it, because it's faster...
and more maneuverable, but you've got to stay in control.
Uh...
oh, yeah...
and the, uh, inertial dampeners only compensate 90% when pulling negative Gs.
So the real trick is knowing your enemy so you can anticipate their next moves.
Okay...
Death Gliders 101...
May I ask why the United States Air Force is taking a renewed interest in my story after 26 years?
Well, all I can tell you is that we have some new information.
Will it prove my story true?
Eventually...
maybe.
Please, tell us what happened to you.
I was asleep in my bed, and a light appeared in my room and took me.
Took you where?
Some kind of space craft I suppose.
I was weightless, floating in mid-air.
And yet...
It was dark, cold...
I couldn't move a muscle even though I was wide awake.
After the light hit you, then what?
The devices came.
They were these green, glowing balls that floated around me.
He said that after the small green spheres stopped scanning him...
they left him alone for a long while.
And then a voice spoke to him, telling him not to be afraid.
And that he would soon be safe again.
Could you ask Professor Wu if he actually saw who was speaking to him?
All the accounts were basically identical...
they all matched Jack's version of events exactly.
Except none of them experienced any kind of physical changes as a result of the abduction.
No, they didn't, but everything else is bang on.
now, admittedly, all of this does sound familiar, clich� even, if you watch enough TV, but...
they all described four green globes that seemed to defy gravity, buzzing around them like insects.
Now, that's too specific a detail to be a coincidence.
The being that abducted them...
I assume they described an Asgard as well?
Short, big eyes, no hair, weird voice...
The Asgard haven't responded to our attempted communications.
Well...
if help is coming, it better arrive soon.
It's open.
How are you doin'?
Well...
I think I'm gettin' another zit...
...and, oh, yeah...
I'm still a kid.
Uh, but beyond that I'm doin' just peachy, thanks.
Why?
Well, Janet's just finished going over the genetic team's analysis of your test results...
How bad can it be?
You're probably not feeling the effects yet...
but,...
something is happening to your body at the cellular level.
Basically, your genetic structure is growing more unstable...
Colonel...
you're dying.
Honestly, I feel fine.
You'll start to notice symptoms as the condition worsens.
How long do I have?
It's hard to say.
Say it anyway...
Weeks...
days...
I don't know.
You'll notice fatigue first.
In the end, your bodies vital organs will completely shut down.
It's like something inside you is causing a total system failure.
I don't get it.
We helped save their skinny asses from the replicators...
and as a thanks, they shrink me and leave me to die.
We're exploring every option we have, Colonel.
We just need you to hang in there.
Thanks for coming.
I'm sure it'll help coming directly from you.
How are Mark and the kids?
Good, great, the kids are great.
I'll tell them you said hi.
I'm sorry...
Sam told be what was going on, but...
what could anyone possibly hope to gain from this?
Can we just, uh, get on with it?
I'm not gettin' any younger.
Well, as I told Sam, our options are pretty limited.
You come all this way just to say goodbye?
At this point, I'm here to recommend we put you in stasis until we better understand your condition.
You want to freeze me.
Colonel, we're not talking about cryogenics as we know it here on Earth.
The risk involved is minimal.
Yeah, well, I've been down this road with the Tok'ra before.
No offense, Jacob, but the last time you guys helped me out of a jam...
...I ended up rescuing an old girlfriend I'd never met before.
We would never subject you to another blending without your express permission.
Good...
because it's never gonna happen.
No pressure, Jack...
but you need to make a decision.
We have a team standing by, but if you wait too long, we may not be able to reverse the cellular breakdown.
Colonel, please.
It's your choice, Jack.
Can I have five minutes to think about it?
You can have 10, Colonel.
You think he'll do it?
If I have to drag the little tyke, kicking and screaming, through the 'gate myself.
I didn't come all this way to watch him die like this...
We have a security breach.
Level 25.
Guest quarters.
Security teams have swept the base three times in the past six hours, inside and out.
They found nothing.
I think it's safe to assume he's no longer here.
Well, Colonel O'Neill knows the SGC as well as anyone.
If he wanted a way out, I'm sure he'd find one.
Well, I've notified state and local authorities.
With any luck, they'll find him soon.
Sir...
there's something you all need to see.
Go on home, kid, before I call the cops.
It's a school night, for cryin' out loud.
How about light beer?
Give me a break...
Harley?
Excuse me?
Yeah...
Harlen Beck.
You served in operation prove force out of Incerlik, right?
Yeah, during the Gulf...
how'd you know that, kid?
What?
Are you kidding?
I ran...
I mean, uh...
my uncle knew a Lt.
Beck from the war.
Yeah, said he was a stand up guy.
Flew an AC-130 gunship over Baghdad.
Well, then, you're uncle had to be in the special ops.
Yeah, he was...
Colonel Jack O'Neill?
You're Jack O'Neill's nephew?
I didn't know he had a sibling.
Uh...
used to.
Uh, yeah...
Uncle Jack's been like a father to me.
You know, since my folks died.
Ah.
So, how's old Jack doin' anyway?
Uh, he's fine...
and he's not that old, either.
Well, tell him...
tell him Harley said to watch his six.
Hey, yeah, uh...
speaking of six...
Look, uh, seeing as how you know my uncle and all...
you think you could do me a little favor?
Selmak has had a chance to digest some of the DNA test results we've been collecting,...
and it seems Colonel O'Neill's condition isn't what we first thought.
He isn't dying?
He is dying, but we think we know the cause.
When we first compared Colonel O'Neill's DNA samples to the ones we had on file, the match was almost perfect.
Almost...
you said there was a tiny abnormality.
That's right...
Selmak thinks he knows why...
This is not Colonel O'Neill.
But...
He's a clone.
I see.
Keep me informed.
No word yet on...
what, exactly, do we call him at this point?
Duplicate O'Neill?
Sir, we think we might have a clearer idea of what might be going on.
Please, enlighten me.
We know that the Asgard clone themselves.
Their very existence depends on their ability to clone their bodies...
and then transfer their consciousness from one to the next.
But they suffer from grave medical conditions due to thousands of years of cloning.
Which will ultimately lead to the fall of their civilization...
if they can't solve the problem of diminishing return in their cloning technology.
What does this have to do with Colonel O'Neill?
We had the abductees DNA that Teal'c and I interviewed scanned for the same abnormalities as...
duplicate O'Neill.
As far as we can tell, none of them are clones.
Which means?
Well, in all likelihood, the Asgard responsible, took the original people...
and replaced them with duplicates so as not to arouse suspicion.
They studied the original for a period of time and then switched them back.
You think whoever took the real Colonel O'Neill is going to return him?
It's all we've got, Sir.
We're hoping the fact that Colonel O'Neill's clone didn't fully mature is a mistake.
What makes you think that?
The previous actions of the Asgard responsible indicate his desire to remain covert.
Jack's clone's condition is a dead giveaway.
So it's a good bet the Asgard doesn't even know there's a problem or else he would have tried to fix it.
Well, they'll figure it out when they try to switch him back.
If they try to switch.
Are you saying if we don't track down the young duplicate, we may not get the real Colonel O'Neill back?
Well, no, we're sure the Asgard would be able to find him, if he wants.
That's not the real issue.
We wish to apprehend the Asgard responsible.
Intercepting the next switch may be our only shot.
Hammond.
General Hammond, Sir...
I have a Lt.
Colonel Beck from the 10th Air Base Wing at the Air Force Academy on the line for you.
He says it has to do with Colonel O'Neill.
Patch him through.
Yes, Sir.
Unless you brought beer, that's close enough.
Colonel, we need you to come back with us.
How'd you find me?
A Lt.
Col.
Beck called General Hammond and placed you in the area.
A man from whom you recently bought bait said he recommended this river.
Tell Jacob thanks for trying, but I'm not interested in the deep-freeze deal.
Look, we're not here to take you to the Tok'ra.
There may not be much time.
Never is, is there?
Okay, well...
There's no easy way to tell you this, so...
Sam's just gonna come right out and say it.
Well, sir...
as you know, the Asgard depend on cloning technology...
Oh, for cryin' out loud...
You have been cloned, O'Neill.
What?!
We think the Asgard took the real you and made a copy.
An unstable one, at that.
The real me?
Yeah...
the original.
That's not your real anything.
I'm...
I'm sorry.
Where's the original?
Well, that's what we hope to find out.
But we need your help.
We calculated approximately a seven day gap between abductions which puts us at tonight.
This plan sucks.
Look, I know you don't think I am...
who I am...
but, as far as I'm concerned, I am...
who...
I am.
The switch is the only chance we have of capturing whoever's behind this.
What about the fact that this body is dying?
I mean, has anyone even thought about that for a second?
Oh...
I see.
You don't care as long as you get the original back.
We just...
we don't know what else to do for you.
Perhaps the Asgard responsible can correct his mistake.
Fine.
Give me a 9-mil.
I'll get it outta the sucker.
We don't know who or what we might be facing yet.
Exactly why you can't just use me as bait and hang me out to dry.
You're never gonna to intercept one of those Asgard beams.
The only chance you have of capturing this guy is me.
Come on...
A zat gun.
Thank you, Sir.
Carter, you still got your ears on?
Yes, Sir.
Daniel, Teal'c?
Everything appears to be normal, O'Neill.
Yeah?
Not to me.
You wanna go over the instructions I gave you again?
Don't worry, Carter, I'm sure I'll figure it out...
Colonel, you all right?
Jack!
Jack!
O'Neill.
What are you all doing in my bedroom?
Hello, do not be afraid.
I assume this is...
important?
Just a little, Sir.
Okay...
...wrong console.
Far right jewel thingy...
up.
...ah, and 3:00 Yeah, I was having the weirdest dream...
There, you see, Carter?
Told you it was no problem.
What's goin' on?
Wow, uh, you know, I'm really much taller than I think.
Carter?
Colonel O'Neill, meet...
Colonel O'Neill.
What's goin' on?
We're pretty sure this...
Asgard over here...
...kidnapped you and attempted to replace you with a clone.
How long was I asleep?
Seven days.
That's a record.
So you're...
...
me.
You Yeah, uh, believe me, if you think it's weird, imagine how I feel being the copy.
He is awakened.
What's happening?
We were kind of hoping you could tell us.
No, no, no...
this is all wrong.
Hey!
I'll tell you what's wrong.
I just woke up, haven't had coffee, let alone a pee in seven days ...and I find out you stole my ass and made a...
mini me.
Carter...
I should be irked, currently...
yes?
Yes...
I would be.
Why don't you tell us who you are?
Loki.
According to Norse mythology, that's the god of mischief.
What did you want with Colonel O'Neill?
I have nothing more to say to any of you.
Hey!
We just saved your flat little white asses from the replicators.
This is the thanks we get?
Hey, at least you're gonna live.
What?
Maybe you're a little put out...
but this guy didn't hit all the right buttons on the Xerox.
This body is gonna fall apart if he doesn't fix me.
I cannot.
All the clones suffer the same fate.
Okay...
I'm going back to my original question...
what's going on?
I am a scientist...
a former geneticist with the Asgard Ruling Council.
Former?
I was stripped of my stature after I was caught performing unsanctioned experiments on humans.
What?
You've got sanctioned ones?
I merely had the courage to do what was necessary to advance our cloning technology.
Instead of "courage", some might call it a lack of morality.
Our population cannot withstand the duplication process for much longer.
Well, how can experimenting on humans change that?
Your bodies are similar to our original form thousands of years ago.
Using your physical makeup as a template, I had hoped to find a way to construct a clone...
that could contain our massively superior intellect.
My research was unsuccessful.
So much for massively superior intellect.
I was gonna say that.
I was going to say...
it was unsuccessful prior to my being caught and banished.
I would have found what I needed eventually.
Why risk coming back here and breaking the law after 19 years?
Because...
I thought he was the one.
Me?
I believed his genetic code contained the key.
Mine?
Stop it.
He was physiologically advanced enough to carry and utilize all the data...
from the ancient repository of knowledge.
That would not be possible for any human one generation ago.
He is a significant step forward on your evolutionary path.
You just found this out recently?
I learned about it when all the Asgard did.
O'Neill is legendary.
Most recently, the Asgard fleet has been distracted by the war with the replicators and the subsequent relocation of our people.
So, you took the opportunity when no one was looking to sneak back here.
I do not regret my actions.
I am trying to save my people.
Look, I know this isn't all about me...
but come on, seriously...
I'm dying here.
I cannot reverse your fate.
Nor can I explain why you did not mature to the proper age as you should have.
Well, easy to see why they kicked you out of the science club.
All right...
I've heard enough.
Carter...
Can you call Thor on this thing?
Please...
do not.
We've already tried contacting the Asgard a number of times...
You know, you'd think if Thor knew about this...
Okay...
pretty sure that's it.
All right, how long are we go...
You all right?
Actually, no.
Uh, what do we do if Thor doesn't show up?
Never mind.
Well, it's about time...
I apologize for not coming sooner.
Loki, what have you done?
Yeah, it seems he's been playing Dr.
Moreau behind your back.
Yes...
Dr.
Moreau.
You know why I am here.
You should have known that O'Neill's genetic code was safeguarded for his own protection.
Excuse me?
A marker was placed in your DNA to prevent any attempts at genetic manipulation.
The abnormality.
That's why the clone didn't mature.
Yes.
Loki will be punished for his actions.
Is it true that Colonel O'Neill is the key to solving your cloning problems?
No.
But I thought I was advanced.
Indeed you are O'Neill, but our scientists have already determined that while you are an important step forward in the evolutionary chain, the missing link we have been searching for still eludes us.
I'm sorry.
Again, I apologize for any inconvenience Loki may have caused.
Yeah, that's what I'd call it.
Unfortunately, the eventual genetic breakdown of the clone is not my doing, but rather the result of Loki's inept methods.
There was no need for the clones to survive.
Look, Thor...
is there anything you can do for him?
The whining's starting to grate.
You wish your clone to live?
You can't just let me die...
He's just a kid...
Are you certain, O'Neill?
I'm thinkin'...
yeah.
Very well.
I will attempt to repair his DNA.
If successful, he should continue to mature at a normal human rate.
Thanks.
You're sure about this?
I've thought a lot about it.
You know...
you...
me...
I mean, we...
never really did embrace high school.
I don't know.
Haven't you ever just wanted to go back and do it all over again?
I mean, especially with all you know now?
No.
Well, from here on in...
you and me are different.
Which is why I'm going to do this.
Hey, listen, do me a favor, huh?
Don't worry, I wasn't gonna keep in touch.
Yeah, it'd just be a little...
Weird.
Weird, yeah.
Yeah.
But look, if you need anything just...
you know...
The Air Force has set me up...
I'll be fine.
You're sure about this?
I mean it's...
high school...
Yes...
go forth, young man.
Subtitle by grekmoz@alvilag.
hu Corrections by Balu
At 0920 hours this morning, someone tried to enter the base using this.
Colonel O'Neill's security ID.
After the person in question was taken into custody, he insisted on seeing you.
Me?
Why?
Well, I was hoping you could figure that one out, Major.
Open it.
Thank you.
Now we're gettin' somewhere.
Sergeant, that, uh, coffee.
I asked for half an hour ago?
You know, any time you feel like gettin' it...
He's a boy, Sir.
As it turns out, Carter...
yes, I am...
for the moment.
Do I know you?
Come on...
it's me.
We tried to contact Colonel O'Neill, even sent someone to his house.
Do you understand how much trouble you're in right now?
Impersonating a military officer is a federal offense.
I am not impersonating anyone.
I am Jack O'Neill.
Finally.
Hot chocolate?
Are you kidding?
Where did you get this?
I didn't...
I didn't get it anywhere.
It's mine.
Because you're Colonel O'Neill.
Exactly.
Look, last night, I ate some dinner, had a beer, went to bed and woke up like this.
Now can we please just get to the part where you and Fraiser run some tests,...
find a cure and make me big again?
This is the security breach?
Daniel...
will you tell them who I am...
please?
Okay...
love to...
who are you?
This young man claims he's Colonel O'Neill.
It's a joke, right?
What's goin' on?
Daniel!
Sounds like him...
at least the loud, grating parts.
Okay...
you want proof?
Carter, you once carried a Tok'ra named Jolinar, who gave her life to save you.
Daniel, until recently, you were anascended being.
Ya broke the rules.
Ya got yourself kicked outta the Oma Desala fan club and had your memory erased.
And you and Bra'tac both just lost your snakes in a Goa'uld ambush.
Had your tretonin yet this morning?
How could this child possess such knowledge?
no clue Because...
it's...
me.
Would anyone care to speculate how a boy could be aware of our most classified information?
Well, Sir...
it could be him.
There is a physical resemblance.
But he can't be more than 15 years old.
Are you saying Colonel O'Neill has, somehow, regressed more than 30 years overnight?
Stranger things have happened...
Name but one.
Well, there was the time he got really old, the time he became a caveman, the time we all swapped bodies...
Why don't we move on to the testing portionof this exercise?
Are you certain, Doctor?
Initial tests show that within an acceptable margin of error,...
the boy's DNA is virtually identical to Colonel O'Neill's.
What size margin of error are we talking about?
Very small.
In a court of law, the DNA sample we took from the boy...
would be considered a high-probability match to the DNA we have on file from Colonel O'Neill.
There is a...
tiny abnormality, but for all intents and purposes...
it's him.
To be honest, this is out of my league.
We've got some specialists flying in.
We're going to run more tests, see what we can learn.
In the meantime, I suggest we try to make him as comfortable as possible.
I'll go set up a PlayStation.
You know, uh, I think you two are enjoying this just...
a little too much.
Well...
you are kinda cute.
That's "Sir" to you.
And being trapped inside a scrawny little body isn't my idea of cute, Carter.
Does possessing a younger body not have certain advantages, O'Neill?
No.
Not seein' it.
What do you mean?
Do you not experience increased health and vitality?
My "vitality" was just fine, thank you.
I think what Teal'c is saying is valid.
How many of us wouldn't trade everything for the chance to be young again...
live our lives over?
Yeah, well, I don't plan on staying like this.
Well, in the meantime, may I make a suggestion?
Try enjoying this as much as we are...
Sir.
Well, it's nice to know some things don't change.
We'll have this stuff sent back to the lab for analysis.
Well, if they find MSG, I will never order from them again.
Come on, what are we doing here, exactly?
Well, this is the last place you remember being...
Older?
Are you conducting some sort of scientific experiment, O'Neill?
Hey, come on, that salsa's still good.
What was the last thing you ate, Sir?
Four cheese burrito, some guacamole on the side...
Anything else?
A beer.
Then I hit the sack.
So, whatever happened to you must have occurred once you were asleep.
Hey!
Do you mind?
Teal'c...
Whoa...
O'Neill...
What is it?
Either I'm...
remembering a particularly bad dream...
or the Asgard paid me a little visit last night.
No offense, but what you're saying doesn't make any sense.
Jack's account sounds like a number of UFO abduction case files I've read.
This you remember...
my birthday you forget.
Looks like you'll have a lot more...
This encounter is incongruous with all previous contact we have had with the Asgard.
Thor has indicated that the Asgard have been keeping an eye on human development on Earth in the past.
But we're allies now.
We've cooperated with them on a number of missions.
This...
I would not have agreed to.
What could they possibly hope to gain from secretly making you younger against your will?
I got nothing.
General, uh, I'd like to cross-reference some of these old abduction accounts.
See if I can find any connection.
Please do.
Major, I believe you had a briefing to run at 1300 hours...
Yes, Sir.
I'll be there.
Wait, wait, the F-302 briefing?
I though I was running that.
Given your current situation, I feel it would be best if Major Carter handled it.
I'm sure you can impart any information she needs to know to fill in the gap...
But...
I mean, I'm the one...
Good.
Dismissed.
Jack,try to understand.
Your situation puts me in a very difficult position.
Uh, General, no offense, but you're not the one who went tobed watching CNN...
and woke up as part of the MTV generation.
Which is exactly why Major Carter's going to handle that briefing.
Sir, I've flown the 302 more times than anyone else.
Be that as it may, the bottom line is a room full of seasoned pilots...
aren't going to respect the opinion of a boy.
Sir, I just look like one...
for the moment...
but those men in that room need my expertise.
And plus, you know, if they're gonna be working here, they're gonna...
have to start gettin' used to...
you know...
unusual things happening.
Look, Jack...
no one is disputing that you may continue to be a valuable asset to the SGC...
but under the circumstances, there's nothing I can do.
I'm sorry.
Yes, Sir.
I understand.
Dumb idea...
It would appear that a great many of the Tau'ri have encountered beings from other worlds.
Yep, hmm...
little do they know how close they are to the truth.
What, exactly, are we looking for, Daniel Jackson?
Well, any abduction accounts that...
match Jack's story, and, um, obviously,...
anyone claiming to have physically regressed several decades overnight.
We just need to enter our search parameters into the database...
It has already been done.
Wow...
that's a lot of people.
Indeed.
Let's see if any of these match Jack's story exactly...
what he said he saw...
four green lights...
That's a little more reasonable.
That's interesting...
of the narrowed down accounts, the most recent is from...
19 year ago.
Eight are here in the 'States.
You know, if these addresses are still valid, we should go talk to these people in person.
What do you hope to learn?
I guess we'll know when we learn it.
As your intel packages show, the F-302 is a space-worthy, fighter-interceptor aircraft...
reverse-engineered from Goa'uld technology.
You're upcoming mission has been dubbed operation blue phoenix.
It'll be a live-fire combat simulation to test how well the 302 fares against actual death gliders.
Major, according to our mission reports, you were second seat...
on the most recent mission involving the 302.
Yes, and that one included close combat.
We'll be covering what was learned in that encounter in this briefing.
Didn't Colonel O'Neill pilot that mission?
Yes, as a matter of fact, he did.
The Colonel also commanded the X-302 during both previous hyper-space window missions, didn't he, Major?
What's your point, Major?
With all due respect, Ma'am, shouldn't Colonel O'Neill be running this briefing?
Colonel O'Neill is unavailable.
However, I've prepared several computer models which should help you...
understand how the 302 handles in combat situations.
Major, no offense, but those aren't going to help me...
when I'm pulling 6 Gs in a dogfight against an alien ship.
As you should know, Captain, the 302 has inertial dampening systems...
...which I am more than qualified to explain in detail, so, let's just...
I just dropped by to say...
Ow!
Sir, please do not resist.
Hey, ease up, big guy.
...
stay focused.
Relax, sir.
I'm warning you...
Sir, please, stay there.
Did I just say I'm warning you?
Hey!
Oh!
All right!
That's it!
Now, I'm mad!
You can release him.
I'll forgo the charges for assaulting a superior officer.
Carter...
I could've taken him.
I'm sure.
Sorry, I'm late.
What'd I miss?
We were just covering the 302's flight capabilities.
Well, then, I'm just in time.
Here's what you need to know...
Major, is this a joke?
No...
this is...
Colonel O'Neill.
I'm only gonna say this once, so I'd suggest that you listen up.
Whatever you say...
Hey!
I realize it doesn't actually say "Colonel" anywhere on my uniform, but it should.
Yes, sir.
Now...
velocity is key during engagement with a glider.
Now, your instincts are gonna tell ya to floor it, because it's faster...
and more maneuverable, but you've got to stay in control.
Uh...
oh, yeah...
and the, uh, inertial dampeners only compensate 90% when pulling negative Gs.
So the real trick is knowing your enemy so you can anticipate their next moves.
Okay...
Death Gliders 101...
May I ask why the United States Air Force is taking a renewed interest in my story after 26 years?
Well, all I can tell you is that we have some new information.
Will it prove my story true?
Eventually...
maybe.
Please, tell us what happened to you.
I was asleep in my bed, and a light appeared in my room and took me.
Took you where?
Some kind of space craft I suppose.
I was weightless, floating in mid-air.
And yet...
It was dark, cold...
I couldn't move a muscle even though I was wide awake.
After the light hit you, then what?
The devices came.
They were these green, glowing balls that floated around me.
He said that after the small green spheres stopped scanning him...
they left him alone for a long while.
And then a voice spoke to him, telling him not to be afraid.
And that he would soon be safe again.
Could you ask Professor Wu if he actually saw who was speaking to him?
All the accounts were basically identical...
they all matched Jack's version of events exactly.
Except none of them experienced any kind of physical changes as a result of the abduction.
No, they didn't, but everything else is bang on.
now, admittedly, all of this does sound familiar, clich� even, if you watch enough TV, but...
they all described four green globes that seemed to defy gravity, buzzing around them like insects.
Now, that's too specific a detail to be a coincidence.
The being that abducted them...
I assume they described an Asgard as well?
Short, big eyes, no hair, weird voice...
The Asgard haven't responded to our attempted communications.
Well...
if help is coming, it better arrive soon.
It's open.
How are you doin'?
Well...
I think I'm gettin' another zit...
...and, oh, yeah...
I'm still a kid.
Uh, but beyond that I'm doin' just peachy, thanks.
Why?
Well, Janet's just finished going over the genetic team's analysis of your test results...
How bad can it be?
You're probably not feeling the effects yet...
but,...
something is happening to your body at the cellular level.
Basically, your genetic structure is growing more unstable...
Colonel...
you're dying.
Honestly, I feel fine.
You'll start to notice symptoms as the condition worsens.
How long do I have?
It's hard to say.
Say it anyway...
Weeks...
days...
I don't know.
You'll notice fatigue first.
In the end, your bodies vital organs will completely shut down.
It's like something inside you is causing a total system failure.
I don't get it.
We helped save their skinny asses from the replicators...
and as a thanks, they shrink me and leave me to die.
We're exploring every option we have, Colonel.
We just need you to hang in there.
Thanks for coming.
I'm sure it'll help coming directly from you.
How are Mark and the kids?
Good, great, the kids are great.
I'll tell them you said hi.
I'm sorry...
Sam told be what was going on, but...
what could anyone possibly hope to gain from this?
Can we just, uh, get on with it?
I'm not gettin' any younger.
Well, as I told Sam, our options are pretty limited.
You come all this way just to say goodbye?
At this point, I'm here to recommend we put you in stasis until we better understand your condition.
You want to freeze me.
Colonel, we're not talking about cryogenics as we know it here on Earth.
The risk involved is minimal.
Yeah, well, I've been down this road with the Tok'ra before.
No offense, Jacob, but the last time you guys helped me out of a jam...
...I ended up rescuing an old girlfriend I'd never met before.
We would never subject you to another blending without your express permission.
Good...
because it's never gonna happen.
No pressure, Jack...
but you need to make a decision.
We have a team standing by, but if you wait too long, we may not be able to reverse the cellular breakdown.
Colonel, please.
It's your choice, Jack.
Can I have five minutes to think about it?
You can have 10, Colonel.
You think he'll do it?
If I have to drag the little tyke, kicking and screaming, through the 'gate myself.
I didn't come all this way to watch him die like this...
We have a security breach.
Level 25.
Guest quarters.
Security teams have swept the base three times in the past six hours, inside and out.
They found nothing.
I think it's safe to assume he's no longer here.
Well, Colonel O'Neill knows the SGC as well as anyone.
If he wanted a way out, I'm sure he'd find one.
Well, I've notified state and local authorities.
With any luck, they'll find him soon.
Sir...
there's something you all need to see.
Go on home, kid, before I call the cops.
It's a school night, for cryin' out loud.
How about light beer?
Give me a break...
Harley?
Excuse me?
Yeah...
Harlen Beck.
You served in operation prove force out of Incerlik, right?
Yeah, during the Gulf...
how'd you know that, kid?
What?
Are you kidding?
I ran...
I mean, uh...
my uncle knew a Lt.
Beck from the war.
Yeah, said he was a stand up guy.
Flew an AC-130 gunship over Baghdad.
Well, then, you're uncle had to be in the special ops.
Yeah, he was...
Colonel Jack O'Neill?
You're Jack O'Neill's nephew?
I didn't know he had a sibling.
Uh...
used to.
Uh, yeah...
Uncle Jack's been like a father to me.
You know, since my folks died.
Ah.
So, how's old Jack doin' anyway?
Uh, he's fine...
and he's not that old, either.
Well, tell him...
tell him Harley said to watch his six.
Hey, yeah, uh...
speaking of six...
Look, uh, seeing as how you know my uncle and all...
you think you could do me a little favor?
Selmak has had a chance to digest some of the DNA test results we've been collecting,...
and it seems Colonel O'Neill's condition isn't what we first thought.
He isn't dying?
He is dying, but we think we know the cause.
When we first compared Colonel O'Neill's DNA samples to the ones we had on file, the match was almost perfect.
Almost...
you said there was a tiny abnormality.
That's right...
Selmak thinks he knows why...
This is not Colonel O'Neill.
But...
He's a clone.
I see.
Keep me informed.
No word yet on...
what, exactly, do we call him at this point?
Duplicate O'Neill?
Sir, we think we might have a clearer idea of what might be going on.
Please, enlighten me.
We know that the Asgard clone themselves.
Their very existence depends on their ability to clone their bodies...
and then transfer their consciousness from one to the next.
But they suffer from grave medical conditions due to thousands of years of cloning.
Which will ultimately lead to the fall of their civilization...
if they can't solve the problem of diminishing return in their cloning technology.
What does this have to do with Colonel O'Neill?
We had the abductees DNA that Teal'c and I interviewed scanned for the same abnormalities as...
duplicate O'Neill.
As far as we can tell, none of them are clones.
Which means?
Well, in all likelihood, the Asgard responsible, took the original people...
and replaced them with duplicates so as not to arouse suspicion.
They studied the original for a period of time and then switched them back.
You think whoever took the real Colonel O'Neill is going to return him?
It's all we've got, Sir.
We're hoping the fact that Colonel O'Neill's clone didn't fully mature is a mistake.
What makes you think that?
The previous actions of the Asgard responsible indicate his desire to remain covert.
Jack's clone's condition is a dead giveaway.
So it's a good bet the Asgard doesn't even know there's a problem or else he would have tried to fix it.
Well, they'll figure it out when they try to switch him back.
If they try to switch.
Are you saying if we don't track down the young duplicate, we may not get the real Colonel O'Neill back?
Well, no, we're sure the Asgard would be able to find him, if he wants.
That's not the real issue.
We wish to apprehend the Asgard responsible.
Intercepting the next switch may be our only shot.
Hammond.
General Hammond, Sir...
I have a Lt.
Colonel Beck from the 10th Air Base Wing at the Air Force Academy on the line for you.
He says it has to do with Colonel O'Neill.
Patch him through.
Yes, Sir.
Unless you brought beer, that's close enough.
Colonel, we need you to come back with us.
How'd you find me?
A Lt.
Col.
Beck called General Hammond and placed you in the area.
A man from whom you recently bought bait said he recommended this river.
Tell Jacob thanks for trying, but I'm not interested in the deep-freeze deal.
Look, we're not here to take you to the Tok'ra.
There may not be much time.
Never is, is there?
Okay, well...
There's no easy way to tell you this, so...
Sam's just gonna come right out and say it.
Well, sir...
as you know, the Asgard depend on cloning technology...
Oh, for cryin' out loud...
You have been cloned, O'Neill.
What?!
We think the Asgard took the real you and made a copy.
An unstable one, at that.
The real me?
Yeah...
the original.
That's not your real anything.
I'm...
I'm sorry.
Where's the original?
Well, that's what we hope to find out.
But we need your help.
We calculated approximately a seven day gap between abductions which puts us at tonight.
This plan sucks.
Look, I know you don't think I am...
who I am...
but, as far as I'm concerned, I am...
who...
I am.
The switch is the only chance we have of capturing whoever's behind this.
What about the fact that this body is dying?
I mean, has anyone even thought about that for a second?
Oh...
I see.
You don't care as long as you get the original back.
We just...
we don't know what else to do for you.
Perhaps the Asgard responsible can correct his mistake.
Fine.
Give me a 9-mil.
I'll get it outta the sucker.
We don't know who or what we might be facing yet.
Exactly why you can't just use me as bait and hang me out to dry.
You're never gonna to intercept one of those Asgard beams.
The only chance you have of capturing this guy is me.
Come on...
A zat gun.
Thank you, Sir.
Carter, you still got your ears on?
Yes, Sir.
Daniel, Teal'c?
Everything appears to be normal, O'Neill.
Yeah?
Not to me.
You wanna go over the instructions I gave you again?
Don't worry, Carter, I'm sure I'll figure it out...
Colonel, you all right?
Jack!
Jack!
O'Neill.
What are you all doing in my bedroom?
Hello, do not be afraid.
I assume this is...
important?
Just a little, Sir.
Okay...
...wrong console.
Far right jewel thingy...
up.
...ah, and 3:00 Yeah, I was having the weirdest dream...
There, you see, Carter?
Told you it was no problem.
What's goin' on?
Wow, uh, you know, I'm really much taller than I think.
Carter?
Colonel O'Neill, meet...
Colonel O'Neill.
What's goin' on?
We're pretty sure this...
Asgard over here...
...kidnapped you and attempted to replace you with a clone.
How long was I asleep?
Seven days.
That's a record.
So you're...
...
me.
You Yeah, uh, believe me, if you think it's weird, imagine how I feel being the copy.
He is awakened.
What's happening?
We were kind of hoping you could tell us.
No, no, no...
this is all wrong.
Hey!
I'll tell you what's wrong.
I just woke up, haven't had coffee, let alone a pee in seven days ...and I find out you stole my ass and made a...
mini me.
Carter...
I should be irked, currently...
yes?
Yes...
I would be.
Why don't you tell us who you are?
Loki.
According to Norse mythology, that's the god of mischief.
What did you want with Colonel O'Neill?
I have nothing more to say to any of you.
Hey!
We just saved your flat little white asses from the replicators.
This is the thanks we get?
Hey, at least you're gonna live.
What?
Maybe you're a little put out...
but this guy didn't hit all the right buttons on the Xerox.
This body is gonna fall apart if he doesn't fix me.
I cannot.
All the clones suffer the same fate.
Okay...
I'm going back to my original question...
what's going on?
I am a scientist...
a former geneticist with the Asgard Ruling Council.
Former?
I was stripped of my stature after I was caught performing unsanctioned experiments on humans.
What?
You've got sanctioned ones?
I merely had the courage to do what was necessary to advance our cloning technology.
Instead of "courage", some might call it a lack of morality.
Our population cannot withstand the duplication process for much longer.
Well, how can experimenting on humans change that?
Your bodies are similar to our original form thousands of years ago.
Using your physical makeup as a template, I had hoped to find a way to construct a clone...
that could contain our massively superior intellect.
My research was unsuccessful.
So much for massively superior intellect.
I was gonna say that.
I was going to say...
it was unsuccessful prior to my being caught and banished.
I would have found what I needed eventually.
Why risk coming back here and breaking the law after 19 years?
Because...
I thought he was the one.
Me?
I believed his genetic code contained the key.
Mine?
Stop it.
He was physiologically advanced enough to carry and utilize all the data...
from the ancient repository of knowledge.
That would not be possible for any human one generation ago.
He is a significant step forward on your evolutionary path.
You just found this out recently?
I learned about it when all the Asgard did.
O'Neill is legendary.
Most recently, the Asgard fleet has been distracted by the war with the replicators and the subsequent relocation of our people.
So, you took the opportunity when no one was looking to sneak back here.
I do not regret my actions.
I am trying to save my people.
Look, I know this isn't all about me...
but come on, seriously...
I'm dying here.
I cannot reverse your fate.
Nor can I explain why you did not mature to the proper age as you should have.
Well, easy to see why they kicked you out of the science club.
All right...
I've heard enough.
Carter...
Can you call Thor on this thing?
Please...
do not.
We've already tried contacting the Asgard a number of times...
You know, you'd think if Thor knew about this...
Okay...
pretty sure that's it.
All right, how long are we go...
You all right?
Actually, no.
Uh, what do we do if Thor doesn't show up?
Never mind.
Well, it's about time...
I apologize for not coming sooner.
Loki, what have you done?
Yeah, it seems he's been playing Dr.
Moreau behind your back.
Yes...
Dr.
Moreau.
You know why I am here.
You should have known that O'Neill's genetic code was safeguarded for his own protection.
Excuse me?
A marker was placed in your DNA to prevent any attempts at genetic manipulation.
The abnormality.
That's why the clone didn't mature.
Yes.
Loki will be punished for his actions.
Is it true that Colonel O'Neill is the key to solving your cloning problems?
No.
But I thought I was advanced.
Indeed you are O'Neill, but our scientists have already determined that while you are an important step forward in the evolutionary chain, the missing link we have been searching for still eludes us.
I'm sorry.
Again, I apologize for any inconvenience Loki may have caused.
Yeah, that's what I'd call it.
Unfortunately, the eventual genetic breakdown of the clone is not my doing, but rather the result of Loki's inept methods.
There was no need for the clones to survive.
Look, Thor...
is there anything you can do for him?
The whining's starting to grate.
You wish your clone to live?
You can't just let me die...
He's just a kid...
Are you certain, O'Neill?
I'm thinkin'...
yeah.
Very well.
I will attempt to repair his DNA.
If successful, he should continue to mature at a normal human rate.
Thanks.
You're sure about this?
I've thought a lot about it.
You know...
you...
me...
I mean, we...
never really did embrace high school.
I don't know.
Haven't you ever just wanted to go back and do it all over again?
I mean, especially with all you know now?
No.
Well, from here on in...
you and me are different.
Which is why I'm going to do this.
Hey, listen, do me a favor, huh?
Don't worry, I wasn't gonna keep in touch.
Yeah, it'd just be a little...
Weird.
Weird, yeah.
Yeah.
But look, if you need anything just...
you know...
The Air Force has set me up...
I'll be fine.
You're sure about this?
I mean it's...
high school...
Yes...
go forth, young man.
Subtitle by grekmoz@alvilag.
hu Corrections by Balu