Émission TV: The X-Files - 6x19
[ Umpire ] Play ball!
[ Man ] Oh, come on!
Ball four !
Take your base !
[ Chattering ] That's it, Moose !
You're gettin' close now.
Bring it, son.
Moose couldn't find the plate if you nailed it to his ass.
Shut your pie hole, Piney.
The kid's gotta learn.
Come straight over the top !
Straight over the top !
Come on !
[ Chattering Continues ] Hot damn.
Exley's up.
Back up !
Exley's up !
Back up !
You sure your boy got the right prescription in those spectacles ?
Oh, don't worry, Ex.
See, I told him to throw it...
right at your big, nappy, home run-hittin' head.
So you can bet a hundred clams that ball's goin'anywhere but there.
[ Cheering, Shouting ] [ Man ] All the way!
Foul !
Foul ball !
Foul !
Foul ball!
Let's go.
Let's go, now.
Come on.
Let's go.
[ Chattering Continues ] Ball !
Moose, straight over the top!
Straight over the top !
Over the top!
Hey, Ex, I heard the Yankees been callin' you.
I'm fine playin' here in the Cactus Leagues.
Nice and quiet.
[ Indistinct Shouting ] Ball !
Leave the cactus alone, son !
I don't know, Ex.
The Yanks could use those 60 home runs a year.
Now thatJackie Robinson's up there in the bigs, people are sayin' you're gonna be next.
The first black Negro man of color in the American League.
Shoot, Ex, you'll be famous, man.
I don't wanna be no famous man.
I just wanna be a man.
[ All Shouting ] Over the top !
Over the top !
[ Umpire ] It's a good one!
That's the key, baby !
Fair ball !
Home run !
Home run !
[ Cheering Continues ] Sixty-one.
[ Laughing, Shouting ] Hey, what's that ?
[ Horses Neighing ] What do you boys want ?
We're just playin' a baseball game here.
We got no beef with you, sir.
It's that black Babe Ruth hidin' behind you.
Josh Exley.
That's all we come for.
Well, you can't have him.
We heard the Yankees want to let a little nigger play ball !
So we just figured we gotta play with him a little bit some first.
And all you niggers and nigger lovers...
can go home !
It's Ex we want.
[ Grunts ] That's what I'm talkin'about.
Straight over the top.
Come in straight over the top with it.
Straight over the top.
Come on, kid.
Come on, get the guns.
Get the guns !
Boys ain't so tough without your shotguns, are ya, fellas ?
You ain't nothin' but a coward, hidin' behind your mama's bedsheet.
Let's see your face.
Holy Mother-- [ TV Sportscaster] It's a gorgeous day for baseball here in the City of the Angels, and I'm told it's a gorgeous day all over our republic today...
from Bangor to Bellflower, from Amarillo to Anchorage.
The sun is shining, and it's a perfect day to play baseball.
Morning.
Eddie Brez will start it off-- [ Continues, Indistinct ] Mulder, it is such a gorgeous day outside.
Have you ever entertained the idea...
of trying to find life on this planet ?
I've seen the life on this planet, Scully, and that is exactly why I'm looking elsewhere.
Did you bring enough ice cream to share with the rest of the class ?
It's not ice cream.
It's a nonfat Tofutti rice dreamsicle.
Ugh !
I bet the air in my mouth tastes better than that.
You sure know how to live it up, Scully.
Oh, you're Mr.
Live It Up.
You're really...
Mr.
Squeeze Every Last Drop Out OfThis Sweet Life.
On this precious Saturday, you've got us grabbing life by the testes.
Stealing reference books from the F.B.I.
library...
in order to go through New Mexico obituaries...
for the years 1 940 to 1 949.
And for what joyful purpose ?
Looking for anomalies, Scully.
Do you know how many so-called flying disc reports there were in the 1 940s ?
I don't care.
Mulder, this is a needle in a haystack.
These poor souls have been dead for 50 years.
Let them rest in peace.
Let sleeping dogs lie.
Well, I won't sit idly by as you hurl cliches at me.
Preparation is the father of inspiration.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.
Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for nonfat Tofutti rice dreamsicles.
Nooooo !
Mulder.
Mulder!
You cheat!
I can't believe it !
You've been reading about baseball this whole time.
I'm reading the box scores, Scully.
You'd like it.
It's like the Pythagorean Theorem for jocks.
It distills all the chaos and action...
of any game in the history of all baseball games...
into one tiny, perfect rectangular sequence of numbers.
I can look at this box, and I can recreate exactly what happened...
on some sunny summer day back in 1 947.
It's like the numbers talk to me.
They comfort me.
They tell me that even though lots of things can change, some things remain the same.
It's-- Boring.
Mulder, can I ask you a personal question ?
Of course not.
Did your mother ever tell you to go outside and play?
Is that Arthur Dales ?
Mulder?
[ Fake Sneeze ] You just defaced property of the U.S.
government.
[ Sportscaster On Radio ] It is gone!
You rebel.
What in the hell took you so long ?
I'm sorry, sir.
I'm looking for Arthur Dales.
I'm Arthur Dales.
No, you're not.
Don't be a wiseass, son.
No, I'm-I'm sorry, sir.
I know Arthur Dales, and you're not Arthur Dales.
Arthur Dales is my brother.
My name also happens to be Arthur Dales.
It's the same name, different guy.
The other Arthur, he moved to Florida, the lucky bastard.
Our parents weren't exactly big in the imagination department when it came to names.
If it'll help you wrapping your little head around this stupefying mystery, Agent Mulder, we had a sister named Arthur too.
And a goldfish.
How do you know my name ?
My brother told me all about you.
He said you were the biggest jackass in the bureau since he retired.
Yeah, we're big fans.
Sometimes we'd stay awake for hours at night just talking about you.
Just fascinating.
Now, unless you're hiding some Chinese food, let's call it a day.
Mr.
Dales, I have a, uh-- I have a photo here of your brother.
Maybe it's you.
It's from many years ago, and you're standing in Roswell, New Mexico.
Roswell.
That's me.
I was a cop once in Roswell.
Okay.
And you're standing with Negro League legend Josh Exley, who disappeared without a trace during a season in which he hit 60 home runs.
-Sixty-one!
Sixty-one home runs in 1 948.
Forty-seven.
Forty-seven, whatever.
I don't really care about the baseball so much.
What I care about is this man in the picture with you...
I believe to be an alien bounty hunter.
Of course you don't care about the baseball, Mr.
Mulder.
You only bothered my brother about the important things...
like government conspiracies and alien bounty hunters...
and the truth with a capital ""T."" Wait a minute.
I like baseball.
You like baseball, huh ?
Yeah.
How many home runs did Mickey Mantle hit ?
A hundred and sixty-three.
[ Scoffs ] Righty, 373 lefty, 536 total.
[ Dales ] What you fail to understand in yourjoyless myopia...
is that baseball is the key to life.
The Rosetta Stone, if you will.
If you just understood baseball better, all your other questions, your-- the aliens, the conspiracies-- they would all in their way be answered by the baseball gods.
Yes, sir.
That may be true.
I'm thinking that your experience in Roswell...
could be germane to a conspiracy between our government and these shape-shifting alien beings.
Oh, don't bore me, son.
My brother Arthur started the X-Files, the Federal Bureau of Obfuscation, before you were born.
He was working for the F.B.I., hunting for aliens...
when you were watching My Best Friend's Martians.
You say ""shape-shifting. "
" Agent Mulder, do you believe...
that love can make a man shape-shift ?
[ Chuckles ] I guess women change men all the time.
I'm not talking about women.
I'm talking about love, passion.
Like the passion you have for proving extraterrestrial life.
Do you believe that that passion can change your very nature ?
Can make you shape-shift from a man into something other than a man ?
What exactly has your brother told you about me ?
Mr.
Dales, if you and your brother have really known about this bounty hunter...
and plans for colonization for 50 years, why the hell wouldn't you have told anybody ?
Nobody would believe me.
I would have believed you.
No.
You weren't ripe.
Not ripe ?
Let me tell you something.
I've been ripe for years.
I am way past ripe.
I'm so ripe, I'm rotten.
This cuts to the very heart of the mystery of what I've been doing for the past ten years.
Oh, the heart of the mystery !
The heart of the mystery !
Ah, there you are !
Mr.
Mulder, maybe you'd better start paying...
a little less attention to the heart of the mystery...
and a little more attention to the mystery of the heart.
You got a dime ?
What is this ?
This little fella goes by the name of Pete Rosebud.
If you keep pumping coffee money into him, he'll tell you a story...
about baseball and aliens and bounty hunters.
You're making me feel like a child.
Perfect.
That's exactly the right place to start from, isn't it ?
Now, the first thing you gotta know about baseball is...
it keeps you forever young.
[ Laughter] Mr.
Exley ?
Mr.
Exley, my name's Arthur Dales.
I'm an employee of the Roswell Police Department.
Have I broken a law, sir ?
You stole !
Second base in the third inning.
I'm a witness.
Officer, I seen that steal.
At least 50 bases this year.
No, sir, you haven't broken any laws.
Not that I'm aware of.
I've been assigned by my superiors to protect you against certain parties.
I'm the one that need protection from certain parties.
Exley, he in bed by 8:00 every night.
Yeah.
I appreciate your concern, sir, but I can protect myself.
Mr.
Exley, I'm not a big sports hero like yourself, sir, and I really don't have an opinion on Negroes...
orJews or Communists...
or even Canadians and vegetarians, for that matter.
But I cannot stomach the murder of a man of any persuasion or any color...
being flaunted and solicited in my town, not on my watch.
So you can be safe with me in a cell down at the precinct, or you can be safe with me here on the bus.
Seeing as how this is still America, you're free to choose, sir.
[ Chattering ] [ Indistinct Muttering ] Hey, Officer Dales, you a decent man, ain't you ?
I try to be.
Well, the fellas feel like umps would treat us better...
if you got us eight more uniforms like these to play in.
Yeah.
You could change your name from the Roswell Grays...
to the Roswell Black and Blues.
[ Silence ] [ All Laughing ] [ Thunder Rumbling ] [ Thunderclap ] What's the matter, Arthur ?
You look like you ain't never seen a black man before.
[ Thunder Continues ] You seriously want me to believe thatJosh Exley, maybe one of the greatest ballplayers of all times, was an alien ?
They're all aliens, Agent Mulder.
All the great ones.
Oh, Babe Ruth was an alien ?
Yeah.
-Joe DiMaggio ?
Sure.
Willie Mays ?
Well, obviously.
Mantle ?
Kofax ?
Gibson ?
Bob or Kirk ?
See, none of the great ones fit in.
Not in this world.
Not in any other world.
[ Knock At Door ] They're all aliens, Mulder.
Till they step between the white chalk lines.
Till they step on the outfield grass.
Like clockwork.
Poorboy with my medicine.
Give the kid a tip, will ya ?
So I assume you're speaking metaphorically.
Speaking metaphorically is for young men like you, Agent McGyver.
I don't have time for that.
I only have time to speak the truth.
You're a real Rockefeller, ain't ya ?
[ Man On P.A., Indistinct ] Ex hits a couple of dingers, 7 60, and that ties the Babe !
Aw, that ball's worth nothin'.
Ex ain't a major leaguer, so the record don't count.
Does too !
Does not !
Does too !
Does not !
Does too !
Does !
Does not !
Not !
[ Man On P.A., Indistinct ] [ Man ] Down in front!
[ Gasps ] [ Laughing ] [ Bats Hitting Balls, Players Chattering ] [ Heaving, Gasping ] Perfect day for a ball game.
[ Laughing ] [ Cheering ] [ Chattering Continues ] [ Laughing ] Get this game goin' again.
[ Chattering Continues ] There, uh, was a bee on you.
Must've been a real big one.
Could've ripped your head off.
Hey, Arthur.
Thanks.
Officer Arthur Dales, making the world safe for baseball and Negroes.
[ Laughter] [ Crowd Cheering ] Play ball !
Come on, now !
Here we go !
[ Umpire ] Line drive!
[ Crowd Booing ] [ Chattering ] Do you know your name, son ?
Josh, do you know where you are ?
[ Speaking Alien Language ] -Josh, man, wake up !
[ Alien Language Continues ] Do you know where you're from ?
Macon.
Macon, Georgia.
-[ Announcer On P.A.] Free round, folks!
That a boy,Josh !
[ Crowd Cheering ] [ Phone Ringing ] Macon Police Department.
Can I help you ?
Yeah.
My name is Arthur Dales.
I'm with the Roswell Police Department.
I'm doing a background check on a gentleman from your area.
His name is Josh Exley.
You want information on a Josh Exley ?
Yeah.
The name rings a bell.
Yeah, I got a Josh Exley.
A six-year-old colored boy disappeared, oh, maybe five years ago.
Have you got a read on this Josh Exley's whereabouts ?
Six years old ?
You wanted to see me about running some chemical tests, sir?
Yeah.
Hold on.
That would make him 1 1 now ?
No, that can't be the one.
I, I love my job.
And is that all you have ?
Are you certain ?
Certain as the sunrise.
I'm sorry, son.
Did you say where you were callin' from ?
Roswell.
Roswell, New Mexico.
Roswell.
Hey, mornin', Poorboy.
Mornin', Ex.
How's the melon ?
My melon's fine.
That boy throws like a lady.
I hear the Yankees scouts are here today.
Gonna hit numero 6-0 ?
There ain't no scouts here today.
Sure there are.
Look.
Right over there.
I'll be damned.
[ Chattering ] Hey, kids.
So how's it goin' ?
Ex is stinkin' up the diamond.
Oh, yeah ?
Yeah.
Well, anybody can have a bad day.
Yeah, but the Yankees scouts are in attendance today.
I don't think they'll relish the idea of him being in the majors...
after such a piss poor outing as this.
[ Man ] Come on, Exley!
Strike two !
[ Man ] Come on, now!
Here we go!
[ Umpire ] Two balls, two strikes now.
[ Chattering ] [ Cheering ] [ Thunder Rumbling ] Ex, why'd you tank that game today ?
I won that game today.
You tanked the game today.
You want me to tell you why ?
Because your name's notJosh Exley.
Josh Exley is a six-year-old kid who disappeared from Macon, Georgia...
about the same time that you showed up in Roswell.
I ain't never been to Macon.
You said you were from Macon.
Well, I also spoke tongues like I did when I was a little boy in church.
[ Speaking Alien Language ] I was joking, Arthur.
Relax.
I'm relaxed.
You're hiding something.
That's why you don't dare get into the major leagues.
'Cause those sportswriters and everybody'd be digging around, and they'd find out what it is, right ?
So you tanked the game in front of those scouts today, disappointing those kids, disappointing your teammates, disappointing your race.
Look here, don't go talkin' about my race.
You don't know nothin' about my race.
I know that liars come in all colors.
You got a secret.
Famous or not, I'm gonna find out what it is.
While you're out chasin' secrets, you make sure you're chasin' the right ones.
[ Glass Shattering ] [ Grunting ] Ex.
Ex.
[ Grunting Continues ] [ Speaking Alien Language ] [ Gasps ] [ Screaming ] [ Screaming ] [ Panting, Muttering ] [ Gasps ] [ Sighs ] Oh.
Oh, thank you.
[ Gasps ] This is ridiculous.
You're supposed to be a big, bad policeman.
Now hold up, Arthur.
Before you go faintin' again, listen to me.
It's me, Arthur.
It's Ex.
This is an interesting dream.
Wake up.
Come on, Artie.
Man, you ain't dreamin'.
This what I really look like.
This the real me.
Ex ?
That's really you under there, Ex ?
Ow !
I ain't under anything, Arthur.
And I'm tryin' not to be insulted by your reaction to my true face.
Look, would it be easier if I looked like this ?
Would this be easier for you to handle ?
[ Laughs ] No.
This is even weirder.
Bus leaves in five-- [ Dales ] So why did you...
leave your family in, uh, Georgia ?
[ Exley ] My people guard their privacy zealously.
I can understand that.
They don't like for us to intermingle with your people.
Their philosophy is, ""We stick to ourselves.
You stick to yourselves.
Everybody's happy."" So what happened ?
You know what happened.
You fell in love with an Earth woman ?
[ Laughing ] What ?
No.
I saw a baseball game.
Oh.
See, there's somethin' you gotta understand about my race.
We don't have a word for laughter.
We don't laugh.
I don't know if you noticed in between all that faintin' you was doin', but we have very tiny mouths.
So no smilin', even.
-&&[ Man Singing ] I tell ya, when I saw that baseball game bein' played, this laughter just-- it just rose up outta me.
You know the sound the ball makes when it hits the bat ?
Yeah.
That was like music to me.
You know, the smell of the grass, the leather mitt.
The first unnecessary thing I ever done in my life, and I fell in love.
I didn't know the unnecessary could feel so good.
You know, the game was meaningless, but it seemed to mean everything to me.
It was useless but perfect.
Yeah.
Like a-- Like a rose.
Yeah, yeah, like a rose.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
See ?
You get it, Arthur.
You're a fan.
Uh-huh.
I tell you, from that moment on...
I just couldn't fix myself to go home.
Come on up here, Ex.
Let's hear that beautiful voice you got on you.
& We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & Where I'm bound Oh, Lord & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together-- & [ Continues, Indistinct ] [ TVAnnouncer] Gray Bus Lines.
You can go home again.
[ Mulder ] Let me get this straight.
A free-spirited alien...
fell in love with baseball and ran away from the other non-fun-having aliens...
and made himself black because that would prevent him from getting to the majors...
where his unspeakable secret might be discovered by an intrusive press and public.
And you're also implying that-- You certainly have a knack...
for turning chicken salad into chicken spit.
You're also implying that this baseball-playing alien...
has something to do with the famous Roswell UFO crash ofJuly, '47, aren't you ?
You're just dying to connect the dots, aren't you, son ?
Look, I give you some wood.
I asked you for a cabinet.
You build me a cathedral.
I don't want a cathedral.
I like where I live.
I just want a place to put my TV.
Understand my drift ?
Drift it is, sir.
Trust the tale, Agent McGyver, not the teller.
That which fascinates us is by definition true.
Speaking metaphorically, of course.
Okay, so was Ex a man who is metaphorically an alien...
or an alien who is metaphorically a man...
or a something in between that was literally an alien/human hybrid ?
It's official.
I am a horse's ass.
What is it to be human, Fox ?
Is it to have the chemistry of a man ?
In the universal scheme of things, a dog's chemistry is nearly identical to that of a man.
But is a dog like a man ?
-[ Mulder ] I have noticed that over the course of time...
a man and his dog will start to look like one another.
[ Dales ] But to be a man is to have the heart of a man.
Integrity, decency, sympathy.
These are the things that make a man a man.
And Ex had them all.
Had them all, more than you or I.
[ Phone Rings ] Dales.
Ted ?
Calm down.
What is it ?
This goo on the glove you gave me.
Is this a joke ?
Why ?
It's not like any chemical compound I've ever seen.
It's from a life-form which doesn't seem to be carbon based.
Which, by the way, is impossible.
This is way out of my league.
I called the F.B.I.
and the Communicable Disease Center in Washington-- Washington ?
Ted, you didn't !
Nobody was supposed to know.
Can you get the glove back to me ?
Sure.
As soon as I finish up here.
I didn't mean to startle you.
I'm Josh.
Oh, I know who you are.
Only the best damn ballplayer west of the Bronx.
Thank you, sir.
Arthur sent me down here to explain the substance.
That's my mitt it ruined.
Where is this stuff from ?
Where did you get it ?
Mars.
[ Laughing ] Actually,just to the left of Mars.
What do you think you're doing ?
[ Gasping, Choking ] Ex.
Ex, there's this fellow down at the precinct...
who's willing to swear on his life that you killed a man this afternoon.
Now, I'm not sure what's-- what's goin' on here, but I, I do know that you're no murderer.
You're gonna have to get out of town, Ex.
Life ain't like baseball, is it ?
No.
No, it's not.
I had a talk with my relative.
Good talk.
He made me understand reason, Arthur.
Family's more important than a game.
So I gotta go home.
You still consider them to be your family ?
Of course I do.
Who you think my family is ?
I don't know.
Your team ?
Don't get cornball on me, man.
Next thing you're gonna be tellin' me is...
I owe it to all the little kids to break the home run record, or I owe it to the black folks, who think I'm one of them, to make it to the majors, or I should just keep playin'...
out of some meaningless human concept of pride or loyalty.
I don't know, Ex.
We don't think like that, man.
We may be able to look like y'all, but we ain't y'all.
You know the big thing that separates us from you ?
What's that ?
We got rhythm.
[ Both Laughing ] [ Sirens Wailing ] I better go.
Yeah.
Hey, could you do me a favor ?
Will you tell people what I did on the field ?
Will you tell your kids how I played the game ?
You know I will, Ex.
Hey, man, one more thing.
What ?
You got a pretty good arm on ya, boy.
[ Laughing ] [ Sirens Approaching ] You may think you know the man, Dales, but believe me,you do not know the man.
You don't know what I know, and you don't know what I don't know.
This is no minor league New Mexico cowboy cop crap.
If I told you what was really goin' on, you'd just stare at me...
in wild-eyed wonder and pee your pants like a baby.
Now tell me what I wanna know.
Where's Exley ?
I told you.
He told me he was goin' home.
[ Umpire ] Play ball!
You sure your boy got the right prescription in those spectacles ?
[ Crowd Shouting, Chattering ] -[ Crowd Cheering ] -[ Umpire ] Home run!
I got a witness puts him at the murder scene.
Now, I know they have a tendency to look alike, but unless he's got a guy runnin' around town looks identical to him, he is a murderer, you could be an accomplice...
and the two of you fast slidin' down a giant razor blade into a big old glass of lemonade.
[ All Shouting ] [ Horses Neighing ] But don't you hand him over...
and you can wear your big hat and that pretty badge as long as you want.
Are we finished ?
No, Mr.
Dales.
You're finished. "
"Home. "
" [ Horses Neighing ] It's alive.
[ Horses Neighing ] It's alive.
[ Shouting ] [ Dales ] Come on !
It's over.
I know.
I warned you.
You didn't listen.
Now you die.
It's the right thing to do.
What do you know of the right thing to do ?
You who would risk exposing the entire project for a game ?
A game.
I hit a home run tonight.
A home run ?
Number 61 .
I set a record.
Show me your true face so you can die with dignity.
As your executioner, I show you my true face before I kill you.
[ Shouting Continues ] Show me your true face, or you will die without honor.
This is my true face.
So be it.
No !
Stop !
Ex !
No !
Let me be, let me be !
[ Horse Neighing ] Arthur, get off of me !
Our blood is like acid to you people.
Arthur, get away.
Don't touch it.
It's just blood, Ex.
Look.
It's just blood.
Wow.
[ Laughing ] & Come and go with me to that land & & Where I'm bound & &I got a brother in that land & &I got a brother in that land & &I got a brother in that land & & Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & &I got a brother in that land & &&[ Humming ] So, uh, I get this message marked ""urgent""...
on my answering service from one Fox Mantle...
telling me to come down to the park for a very special, very early or very late birthday present.
And Mulder, I don't see any nicely wrapped presents lying around.
So what gives ?
You've never hit a baseball, have you, Scully ?
No, I guess I have found...
more necessary things to do with my time...
than slap a piece of horse hide with a stick.
-&I got a sister in that land & Get over here, Scully.
&I got a sister in that land & & Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & -&I got a sister in that land & Is this my birthday present, Mulder ?
-&I got a sister in that land & You shouldn't have.
This ain't cheap.
I'm payin' that kid ten bucks an hour to shag balls.
-& Where I'm bound & That's not a bad piece of ash, huh ?
The bat.
I'm talkin' about the bat.
Now, don't strangle it.
You just want to shake hands with it.
All right. "
" Hello, Mr.
Bat.
It's a pleasure."" ""Oh, no, no, Miss Scully.
The pleasure is all mine."" Okay, now we want to go hips before hands, okay ?
And we wanna stride forward and turn.
That's all we're thinking about.
-So we go hips before hands, all right ?
-Okay.
One more time.
Hips before hands.
All right ?
Yeah.
What is it ?
Hips before hands.
Right.
We're gonna wait on the pitch, keep our eye on the ball.
All right.
Then we're just gonna make contact.
We're just gonna let it fly, Scully, okay ?
Mm-hmm.
Ready ?
I'm in the middle.
[ Mulder ] All right, fire away, Poorboy.
Ooh !
That's good.
All right, what you may find as you concentrate on hitting that little ball, the rest of the world just fades away, all your everyday nagging concerns.
The ticking of your biological clock.
How you probably couldn't afford that nice new suede coat on a G-woman's salary.
How you threw away a promising career in medicine...
to hunt aliens with your crackpot, albeit brilliant, partner.
Getting to the heart of a global conspiracy.
Your obscenely overdue triple-X bill.
Oh, I'm sorry, Scully.
Those last two problems are mine, not yours.
Shut up, Mulder.
I'm playing baseball.
Ooh !
& Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & & Come and go with me to that land & & Come and go with me to that land & & Come and go with me to that land & & Where I'm bound && & Where I'm bound && [ Child ] I made this!
[ Child ] I made this!
[ Man ] Oh, come on!
Ball four !
Take your base !
[ Chattering ] That's it, Moose !
You're gettin' close now.
Bring it, son.
Moose couldn't find the plate if you nailed it to his ass.
Shut your pie hole, Piney.
The kid's gotta learn.
Come straight over the top !
Straight over the top !
Come on !
[ Chattering Continues ] Hot damn.
Exley's up.
Back up !
Exley's up !
Back up !
You sure your boy got the right prescription in those spectacles ?
Oh, don't worry, Ex.
See, I told him to throw it...
right at your big, nappy, home run-hittin' head.
So you can bet a hundred clams that ball's goin'anywhere but there.
[ Cheering, Shouting ] [ Man ] All the way!
Foul !
Foul ball !
Foul !
Foul ball!
Let's go.
Let's go, now.
Come on.
Let's go.
[ Chattering Continues ] Ball !
Moose, straight over the top!
Straight over the top !
Over the top!
Hey, Ex, I heard the Yankees been callin' you.
I'm fine playin' here in the Cactus Leagues.
Nice and quiet.
[ Indistinct Shouting ] Ball !
Leave the cactus alone, son !
I don't know, Ex.
The Yanks could use those 60 home runs a year.
Now thatJackie Robinson's up there in the bigs, people are sayin' you're gonna be next.
The first black Negro man of color in the American League.
Shoot, Ex, you'll be famous, man.
I don't wanna be no famous man.
I just wanna be a man.
[ All Shouting ] Over the top !
Over the top !
[ Umpire ] It's a good one!
That's the key, baby !
Fair ball !
Home run !
Home run !
[ Cheering Continues ] Sixty-one.
[ Laughing, Shouting ] Hey, what's that ?
[ Horses Neighing ] What do you boys want ?
We're just playin' a baseball game here.
We got no beef with you, sir.
It's that black Babe Ruth hidin' behind you.
Josh Exley.
That's all we come for.
Well, you can't have him.
We heard the Yankees want to let a little nigger play ball !
So we just figured we gotta play with him a little bit some first.
And all you niggers and nigger lovers...
can go home !
It's Ex we want.
[ Grunts ] That's what I'm talkin'about.
Straight over the top.
Come in straight over the top with it.
Straight over the top.
Come on, kid.
Come on, get the guns.
Get the guns !
Boys ain't so tough without your shotguns, are ya, fellas ?
You ain't nothin' but a coward, hidin' behind your mama's bedsheet.
Let's see your face.
Holy Mother-- [ TV Sportscaster] It's a gorgeous day for baseball here in the City of the Angels, and I'm told it's a gorgeous day all over our republic today...
from Bangor to Bellflower, from Amarillo to Anchorage.
The sun is shining, and it's a perfect day to play baseball.
Morning.
Eddie Brez will start it off-- [ Continues, Indistinct ] Mulder, it is such a gorgeous day outside.
Have you ever entertained the idea...
of trying to find life on this planet ?
I've seen the life on this planet, Scully, and that is exactly why I'm looking elsewhere.
Did you bring enough ice cream to share with the rest of the class ?
It's not ice cream.
It's a nonfat Tofutti rice dreamsicle.
Ugh !
I bet the air in my mouth tastes better than that.
You sure know how to live it up, Scully.
Oh, you're Mr.
Live It Up.
You're really...
Mr.
Squeeze Every Last Drop Out OfThis Sweet Life.
On this precious Saturday, you've got us grabbing life by the testes.
Stealing reference books from the F.B.I.
library...
in order to go through New Mexico obituaries...
for the years 1 940 to 1 949.
And for what joyful purpose ?
Looking for anomalies, Scully.
Do you know how many so-called flying disc reports there were in the 1 940s ?
I don't care.
Mulder, this is a needle in a haystack.
These poor souls have been dead for 50 years.
Let them rest in peace.
Let sleeping dogs lie.
Well, I won't sit idly by as you hurl cliches at me.
Preparation is the father of inspiration.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.
Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die.
I scream, you scream, we all scream for nonfat Tofutti rice dreamsicles.
Nooooo !
Mulder.
Mulder!
You cheat!
I can't believe it !
You've been reading about baseball this whole time.
I'm reading the box scores, Scully.
You'd like it.
It's like the Pythagorean Theorem for jocks.
It distills all the chaos and action...
of any game in the history of all baseball games...
into one tiny, perfect rectangular sequence of numbers.
I can look at this box, and I can recreate exactly what happened...
on some sunny summer day back in 1 947.
It's like the numbers talk to me.
They comfort me.
They tell me that even though lots of things can change, some things remain the same.
It's-- Boring.
Mulder, can I ask you a personal question ?
Of course not.
Did your mother ever tell you to go outside and play?
Is that Arthur Dales ?
Mulder?
[ Fake Sneeze ] You just defaced property of the U.S.
government.
[ Sportscaster On Radio ] It is gone!
You rebel.
What in the hell took you so long ?
I'm sorry, sir.
I'm looking for Arthur Dales.
I'm Arthur Dales.
No, you're not.
Don't be a wiseass, son.
No, I'm-I'm sorry, sir.
I know Arthur Dales, and you're not Arthur Dales.
Arthur Dales is my brother.
My name also happens to be Arthur Dales.
It's the same name, different guy.
The other Arthur, he moved to Florida, the lucky bastard.
Our parents weren't exactly big in the imagination department when it came to names.
If it'll help you wrapping your little head around this stupefying mystery, Agent Mulder, we had a sister named Arthur too.
And a goldfish.
How do you know my name ?
My brother told me all about you.
He said you were the biggest jackass in the bureau since he retired.
Yeah, we're big fans.
Sometimes we'd stay awake for hours at night just talking about you.
Just fascinating.
Now, unless you're hiding some Chinese food, let's call it a day.
Mr.
Dales, I have a, uh-- I have a photo here of your brother.
Maybe it's you.
It's from many years ago, and you're standing in Roswell, New Mexico.
Roswell.
That's me.
I was a cop once in Roswell.
Okay.
And you're standing with Negro League legend Josh Exley, who disappeared without a trace during a season in which he hit 60 home runs.
-Sixty-one!
Sixty-one home runs in 1 948.
Forty-seven.
Forty-seven, whatever.
I don't really care about the baseball so much.
What I care about is this man in the picture with you...
I believe to be an alien bounty hunter.
Of course you don't care about the baseball, Mr.
Mulder.
You only bothered my brother about the important things...
like government conspiracies and alien bounty hunters...
and the truth with a capital ""T."" Wait a minute.
I like baseball.
You like baseball, huh ?
Yeah.
How many home runs did Mickey Mantle hit ?
A hundred and sixty-three.
[ Scoffs ] Righty, 373 lefty, 536 total.
[ Dales ] What you fail to understand in yourjoyless myopia...
is that baseball is the key to life.
The Rosetta Stone, if you will.
If you just understood baseball better, all your other questions, your-- the aliens, the conspiracies-- they would all in their way be answered by the baseball gods.
Yes, sir.
That may be true.
I'm thinking that your experience in Roswell...
could be germane to a conspiracy between our government and these shape-shifting alien beings.
Oh, don't bore me, son.
My brother Arthur started the X-Files, the Federal Bureau of Obfuscation, before you were born.
He was working for the F.B.I., hunting for aliens...
when you were watching My Best Friend's Martians.
You say ""shape-shifting. "
" Agent Mulder, do you believe...
that love can make a man shape-shift ?
[ Chuckles ] I guess women change men all the time.
I'm not talking about women.
I'm talking about love, passion.
Like the passion you have for proving extraterrestrial life.
Do you believe that that passion can change your very nature ?
Can make you shape-shift from a man into something other than a man ?
What exactly has your brother told you about me ?
Mr.
Dales, if you and your brother have really known about this bounty hunter...
and plans for colonization for 50 years, why the hell wouldn't you have told anybody ?
Nobody would believe me.
I would have believed you.
No.
You weren't ripe.
Not ripe ?
Let me tell you something.
I've been ripe for years.
I am way past ripe.
I'm so ripe, I'm rotten.
This cuts to the very heart of the mystery of what I've been doing for the past ten years.
Oh, the heart of the mystery !
The heart of the mystery !
Ah, there you are !
Mr.
Mulder, maybe you'd better start paying...
a little less attention to the heart of the mystery...
and a little more attention to the mystery of the heart.
You got a dime ?
What is this ?
This little fella goes by the name of Pete Rosebud.
If you keep pumping coffee money into him, he'll tell you a story...
about baseball and aliens and bounty hunters.
You're making me feel like a child.
Perfect.
That's exactly the right place to start from, isn't it ?
Now, the first thing you gotta know about baseball is...
it keeps you forever young.
[ Laughter] Mr.
Exley ?
Mr.
Exley, my name's Arthur Dales.
I'm an employee of the Roswell Police Department.
Have I broken a law, sir ?
You stole !
Second base in the third inning.
I'm a witness.
Officer, I seen that steal.
At least 50 bases this year.
No, sir, you haven't broken any laws.
Not that I'm aware of.
I've been assigned by my superiors to protect you against certain parties.
I'm the one that need protection from certain parties.
Exley, he in bed by 8:00 every night.
Yeah.
I appreciate your concern, sir, but I can protect myself.
Mr.
Exley, I'm not a big sports hero like yourself, sir, and I really don't have an opinion on Negroes...
orJews or Communists...
or even Canadians and vegetarians, for that matter.
But I cannot stomach the murder of a man of any persuasion or any color...
being flaunted and solicited in my town, not on my watch.
So you can be safe with me in a cell down at the precinct, or you can be safe with me here on the bus.
Seeing as how this is still America, you're free to choose, sir.
[ Chattering ] [ Indistinct Muttering ] Hey, Officer Dales, you a decent man, ain't you ?
I try to be.
Well, the fellas feel like umps would treat us better...
if you got us eight more uniforms like these to play in.
Yeah.
You could change your name from the Roswell Grays...
to the Roswell Black and Blues.
[ Silence ] [ All Laughing ] [ Thunder Rumbling ] [ Thunderclap ] What's the matter, Arthur ?
You look like you ain't never seen a black man before.
[ Thunder Continues ] You seriously want me to believe thatJosh Exley, maybe one of the greatest ballplayers of all times, was an alien ?
They're all aliens, Agent Mulder.
All the great ones.
Oh, Babe Ruth was an alien ?
Yeah.
-Joe DiMaggio ?
Sure.
Willie Mays ?
Well, obviously.
Mantle ?
Kofax ?
Gibson ?
Bob or Kirk ?
See, none of the great ones fit in.
Not in this world.
Not in any other world.
[ Knock At Door ] They're all aliens, Mulder.
Till they step between the white chalk lines.
Till they step on the outfield grass.
Like clockwork.
Poorboy with my medicine.
Give the kid a tip, will ya ?
So I assume you're speaking metaphorically.
Speaking metaphorically is for young men like you, Agent McGyver.
I don't have time for that.
I only have time to speak the truth.
You're a real Rockefeller, ain't ya ?
[ Man On P.A., Indistinct ] Ex hits a couple of dingers, 7 60, and that ties the Babe !
Aw, that ball's worth nothin'.
Ex ain't a major leaguer, so the record don't count.
Does too !
Does not !
Does too !
Does not !
Does too !
Does !
Does not !
Not !
[ Man On P.A., Indistinct ] [ Man ] Down in front!
[ Gasps ] [ Laughing ] [ Bats Hitting Balls, Players Chattering ] [ Heaving, Gasping ] Perfect day for a ball game.
[ Laughing ] [ Cheering ] [ Chattering Continues ] [ Laughing ] Get this game goin' again.
[ Chattering Continues ] There, uh, was a bee on you.
Must've been a real big one.
Could've ripped your head off.
Hey, Arthur.
Thanks.
Officer Arthur Dales, making the world safe for baseball and Negroes.
[ Laughter] [ Crowd Cheering ] Play ball !
Come on, now !
Here we go !
[ Umpire ] Line drive!
[ Crowd Booing ] [ Chattering ] Do you know your name, son ?
Josh, do you know where you are ?
[ Speaking Alien Language ] -Josh, man, wake up !
[ Alien Language Continues ] Do you know where you're from ?
Macon.
Macon, Georgia.
-[ Announcer On P.A.] Free round, folks!
That a boy,Josh !
[ Crowd Cheering ] [ Phone Ringing ] Macon Police Department.
Can I help you ?
Yeah.
My name is Arthur Dales.
I'm with the Roswell Police Department.
I'm doing a background check on a gentleman from your area.
His name is Josh Exley.
You want information on a Josh Exley ?
Yeah.
The name rings a bell.
Yeah, I got a Josh Exley.
A six-year-old colored boy disappeared, oh, maybe five years ago.
Have you got a read on this Josh Exley's whereabouts ?
Six years old ?
You wanted to see me about running some chemical tests, sir?
Yeah.
Hold on.
That would make him 1 1 now ?
No, that can't be the one.
I, I love my job.
And is that all you have ?
Are you certain ?
Certain as the sunrise.
I'm sorry, son.
Did you say where you were callin' from ?
Roswell.
Roswell, New Mexico.
Roswell.
Hey, mornin', Poorboy.
Mornin', Ex.
How's the melon ?
My melon's fine.
That boy throws like a lady.
I hear the Yankees scouts are here today.
Gonna hit numero 6-0 ?
There ain't no scouts here today.
Sure there are.
Look.
Right over there.
I'll be damned.
[ Chattering ] Hey, kids.
So how's it goin' ?
Ex is stinkin' up the diamond.
Oh, yeah ?
Yeah.
Well, anybody can have a bad day.
Yeah, but the Yankees scouts are in attendance today.
I don't think they'll relish the idea of him being in the majors...
after such a piss poor outing as this.
[ Man ] Come on, Exley!
Strike two !
[ Man ] Come on, now!
Here we go!
[ Umpire ] Two balls, two strikes now.
[ Chattering ] [ Cheering ] [ Thunder Rumbling ] Ex, why'd you tank that game today ?
I won that game today.
You tanked the game today.
You want me to tell you why ?
Because your name's notJosh Exley.
Josh Exley is a six-year-old kid who disappeared from Macon, Georgia...
about the same time that you showed up in Roswell.
I ain't never been to Macon.
You said you were from Macon.
Well, I also spoke tongues like I did when I was a little boy in church.
[ Speaking Alien Language ] I was joking, Arthur.
Relax.
I'm relaxed.
You're hiding something.
That's why you don't dare get into the major leagues.
'Cause those sportswriters and everybody'd be digging around, and they'd find out what it is, right ?
So you tanked the game in front of those scouts today, disappointing those kids, disappointing your teammates, disappointing your race.
Look here, don't go talkin' about my race.
You don't know nothin' about my race.
I know that liars come in all colors.
You got a secret.
Famous or not, I'm gonna find out what it is.
While you're out chasin' secrets, you make sure you're chasin' the right ones.
[ Glass Shattering ] [ Grunting ] Ex.
Ex.
[ Grunting Continues ] [ Speaking Alien Language ] [ Gasps ] [ Screaming ] [ Screaming ] [ Panting, Muttering ] [ Gasps ] [ Sighs ] Oh.
Oh, thank you.
[ Gasps ] This is ridiculous.
You're supposed to be a big, bad policeman.
Now hold up, Arthur.
Before you go faintin' again, listen to me.
It's me, Arthur.
It's Ex.
This is an interesting dream.
Wake up.
Come on, Artie.
Man, you ain't dreamin'.
This what I really look like.
This the real me.
Ex ?
That's really you under there, Ex ?
Ow !
I ain't under anything, Arthur.
And I'm tryin' not to be insulted by your reaction to my true face.
Look, would it be easier if I looked like this ?
Would this be easier for you to handle ?
[ Laughs ] No.
This is even weirder.
Bus leaves in five-- [ Dales ] So why did you...
leave your family in, uh, Georgia ?
[ Exley ] My people guard their privacy zealously.
I can understand that.
They don't like for us to intermingle with your people.
Their philosophy is, ""We stick to ourselves.
You stick to yourselves.
Everybody's happy."" So what happened ?
You know what happened.
You fell in love with an Earth woman ?
[ Laughing ] What ?
No.
I saw a baseball game.
Oh.
See, there's somethin' you gotta understand about my race.
We don't have a word for laughter.
We don't laugh.
I don't know if you noticed in between all that faintin' you was doin', but we have very tiny mouths.
So no smilin', even.
-&&[ Man Singing ] I tell ya, when I saw that baseball game bein' played, this laughter just-- it just rose up outta me.
You know the sound the ball makes when it hits the bat ?
Yeah.
That was like music to me.
You know, the smell of the grass, the leather mitt.
The first unnecessary thing I ever done in my life, and I fell in love.
I didn't know the unnecessary could feel so good.
You know, the game was meaningless, but it seemed to mean everything to me.
It was useless but perfect.
Yeah.
Like a-- Like a rose.
Yeah, yeah, like a rose.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
See ?
You get it, Arthur.
You're a fan.
Uh-huh.
I tell you, from that moment on...
I just couldn't fix myself to go home.
Come on up here, Ex.
Let's hear that beautiful voice you got on you.
& We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & Where I'm bound Oh, Lord & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together in that land & & We'll all be together-- & [ Continues, Indistinct ] [ TVAnnouncer] Gray Bus Lines.
You can go home again.
[ Mulder ] Let me get this straight.
A free-spirited alien...
fell in love with baseball and ran away from the other non-fun-having aliens...
and made himself black because that would prevent him from getting to the majors...
where his unspeakable secret might be discovered by an intrusive press and public.
And you're also implying that-- You certainly have a knack...
for turning chicken salad into chicken spit.
You're also implying that this baseball-playing alien...
has something to do with the famous Roswell UFO crash ofJuly, '47, aren't you ?
You're just dying to connect the dots, aren't you, son ?
Look, I give you some wood.
I asked you for a cabinet.
You build me a cathedral.
I don't want a cathedral.
I like where I live.
I just want a place to put my TV.
Understand my drift ?
Drift it is, sir.
Trust the tale, Agent McGyver, not the teller.
That which fascinates us is by definition true.
Speaking metaphorically, of course.
Okay, so was Ex a man who is metaphorically an alien...
or an alien who is metaphorically a man...
or a something in between that was literally an alien/human hybrid ?
It's official.
I am a horse's ass.
What is it to be human, Fox ?
Is it to have the chemistry of a man ?
In the universal scheme of things, a dog's chemistry is nearly identical to that of a man.
But is a dog like a man ?
-[ Mulder ] I have noticed that over the course of time...
a man and his dog will start to look like one another.
[ Dales ] But to be a man is to have the heart of a man.
Integrity, decency, sympathy.
These are the things that make a man a man.
And Ex had them all.
Had them all, more than you or I.
[ Phone Rings ] Dales.
Ted ?
Calm down.
What is it ?
This goo on the glove you gave me.
Is this a joke ?
Why ?
It's not like any chemical compound I've ever seen.
It's from a life-form which doesn't seem to be carbon based.
Which, by the way, is impossible.
This is way out of my league.
I called the F.B.I.
and the Communicable Disease Center in Washington-- Washington ?
Ted, you didn't !
Nobody was supposed to know.
Can you get the glove back to me ?
Sure.
As soon as I finish up here.
I didn't mean to startle you.
I'm Josh.
Oh, I know who you are.
Only the best damn ballplayer west of the Bronx.
Thank you, sir.
Arthur sent me down here to explain the substance.
That's my mitt it ruined.
Where is this stuff from ?
Where did you get it ?
Mars.
[ Laughing ] Actually,just to the left of Mars.
What do you think you're doing ?
[ Gasping, Choking ] Ex.
Ex, there's this fellow down at the precinct...
who's willing to swear on his life that you killed a man this afternoon.
Now, I'm not sure what's-- what's goin' on here, but I, I do know that you're no murderer.
You're gonna have to get out of town, Ex.
Life ain't like baseball, is it ?
No.
No, it's not.
I had a talk with my relative.
Good talk.
He made me understand reason, Arthur.
Family's more important than a game.
So I gotta go home.
You still consider them to be your family ?
Of course I do.
Who you think my family is ?
I don't know.
Your team ?
Don't get cornball on me, man.
Next thing you're gonna be tellin' me is...
I owe it to all the little kids to break the home run record, or I owe it to the black folks, who think I'm one of them, to make it to the majors, or I should just keep playin'...
out of some meaningless human concept of pride or loyalty.
I don't know, Ex.
We don't think like that, man.
We may be able to look like y'all, but we ain't y'all.
You know the big thing that separates us from you ?
What's that ?
We got rhythm.
[ Both Laughing ] [ Sirens Wailing ] I better go.
Yeah.
Hey, could you do me a favor ?
Will you tell people what I did on the field ?
Will you tell your kids how I played the game ?
You know I will, Ex.
Hey, man, one more thing.
What ?
You got a pretty good arm on ya, boy.
[ Laughing ] [ Sirens Approaching ] You may think you know the man, Dales, but believe me,you do not know the man.
You don't know what I know, and you don't know what I don't know.
This is no minor league New Mexico cowboy cop crap.
If I told you what was really goin' on, you'd just stare at me...
in wild-eyed wonder and pee your pants like a baby.
Now tell me what I wanna know.
Where's Exley ?
I told you.
He told me he was goin' home.
[ Umpire ] Play ball!
You sure your boy got the right prescription in those spectacles ?
[ Crowd Shouting, Chattering ] -[ Crowd Cheering ] -[ Umpire ] Home run!
I got a witness puts him at the murder scene.
Now, I know they have a tendency to look alike, but unless he's got a guy runnin' around town looks identical to him, he is a murderer, you could be an accomplice...
and the two of you fast slidin' down a giant razor blade into a big old glass of lemonade.
[ All Shouting ] [ Horses Neighing ] But don't you hand him over...
and you can wear your big hat and that pretty badge as long as you want.
Are we finished ?
No, Mr.
Dales.
You're finished. "
"Home. "
" [ Horses Neighing ] It's alive.
[ Horses Neighing ] It's alive.
[ Shouting ] [ Dales ] Come on !
It's over.
I know.
I warned you.
You didn't listen.
Now you die.
It's the right thing to do.
What do you know of the right thing to do ?
You who would risk exposing the entire project for a game ?
A game.
I hit a home run tonight.
A home run ?
Number 61 .
I set a record.
Show me your true face so you can die with dignity.
As your executioner, I show you my true face before I kill you.
[ Shouting Continues ] Show me your true face, or you will die without honor.
This is my true face.
So be it.
No !
Stop !
Ex !
No !
Let me be, let me be !
[ Horse Neighing ] Arthur, get off of me !
Our blood is like acid to you people.
Arthur, get away.
Don't touch it.
It's just blood, Ex.
Look.
It's just blood.
Wow.
[ Laughing ] & Come and go with me to that land & & Where I'm bound & &I got a brother in that land & &I got a brother in that land & &I got a brother in that land & & Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & &I got a brother in that land & &&[ Humming ] So, uh, I get this message marked ""urgent""...
on my answering service from one Fox Mantle...
telling me to come down to the park for a very special, very early or very late birthday present.
And Mulder, I don't see any nicely wrapped presents lying around.
So what gives ?
You've never hit a baseball, have you, Scully ?
No, I guess I have found...
more necessary things to do with my time...
than slap a piece of horse hide with a stick.
-&I got a sister in that land & Get over here, Scully.
&I got a sister in that land & & Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & -&I got a sister in that land & Is this my birthday present, Mulder ?
-&I got a sister in that land & You shouldn't have.
This ain't cheap.
I'm payin' that kid ten bucks an hour to shag balls.
-& Where I'm bound & That's not a bad piece of ash, huh ?
The bat.
I'm talkin' about the bat.
Now, don't strangle it.
You just want to shake hands with it.
All right. "
" Hello, Mr.
Bat.
It's a pleasure."" ""Oh, no, no, Miss Scully.
The pleasure is all mine."" Okay, now we want to go hips before hands, okay ?
And we wanna stride forward and turn.
That's all we're thinking about.
-So we go hips before hands, all right ?
-Okay.
One more time.
Hips before hands.
All right ?
Yeah.
What is it ?
Hips before hands.
Right.
We're gonna wait on the pitch, keep our eye on the ball.
All right.
Then we're just gonna make contact.
We're just gonna let it fly, Scully, okay ?
Mm-hmm.
Ready ?
I'm in the middle.
[ Mulder ] All right, fire away, Poorboy.
Ooh !
That's good.
All right, what you may find as you concentrate on hitting that little ball, the rest of the world just fades away, all your everyday nagging concerns.
The ticking of your biological clock.
How you probably couldn't afford that nice new suede coat on a G-woman's salary.
How you threw away a promising career in medicine...
to hunt aliens with your crackpot, albeit brilliant, partner.
Getting to the heart of a global conspiracy.
Your obscenely overdue triple-X bill.
Oh, I'm sorry, Scully.
Those last two problems are mine, not yours.
Shut up, Mulder.
I'm playing baseball.
Ooh !
& Where I'm bound & & Where I'm bound & & Come and go with me to that land & & Come and go with me to that land & & Come and go with me to that land & & Where I'm bound && & Where I'm bound && [ Child ] I made this!
[ Child ] I made this!